7 Stages of a Dying Marriage: How to Tell If Your Marriage Is Beyond Repair

how to tell if your marriage is beyond repair

Marriage is often thought of as a lifetime commitment, but unfortunately, not all marriages are meant to last forever. Sometimes, couples grow apart or encounter issues that are too difficult to overcome.

If you’re wondering whether your marriage is beyond repair, it’s important to understand the stages of a dying marriage and when it’s time to file for divorce.

At Apple Payne Law, we have seen many couples who have gone through this process, and we understand the emotional toll it can take. In this blog, we will outline the seven stages of a dying marriage so you can tell if your marriage is beyond repair.

Stage 1: The Drift

The first stage of a dying marriage is the drift.

In this stage, couples begin to feel disconnected from one another. They may have different interests or goals, or they may simply be too busy with work or other obligations to spend quality time together.

Communication may become more superficial or nonexistent, and couples may start to feel like they are living separate lives.

Stage 2: Lack of Communication

When couples stop talking to each other or only engage in surface-level conversations, it can be difficult to address deeper issues in the relationship. This lack of communication can lead to feelings of resentment, frustration, and even anger.

Stage 3: Doubt

In this stage, couples begin to question whether they still love each other or whether their marriage is worth saving. They may feel frustrated or resentful towards their spouse and may start to fantasize about being with someone else.

Stage 4: Disillusionment

Couples at this stage can begin to feel disillusioned with their marriage and may start to withdraw emotionally or physically from their spouse. They may feel trapped in the relationship and may start to look for ways to escape, whether it’s through work, hobbies, or other relationships.

Stage 5: Lack of Intimacy

Another common issue in a dying marriage is a lack of intimacy. This can include physical intimacy, as well as emotional intimacy, such as feeling connected and supported by your partner.

When there is a lack of intimacy in a relationship, it can lead to feelings of loneliness, rejection, and even depression.

Stage 6: Lack of Trust

When trust is broken—whether it’s through infidelity, lies, or other betrayals—it can be difficult to rebuild the relationship. Lack of trust can lead to feelings of suspicion, anger, and resentment and can make it difficult to move forward as a couple.

Stage 7: The Decision

The final stage of a dying marriage is the big decision. In this stage, couples may decide to separate or divorce. They may feel like they have exhausted all options for saving their marriage and may feel more comfortable being apart than together.

If you’re considering separation or divorce, it’s important to seek legal counsel from a qualified divorce attorney. A divorce attorney can help you understand your legal rights and obligations, as well as guide you through the process of separating your assets and resolving any custody or support issues.

How Can a Divorce Lawyer Help Me?

A divorce lawyer can:

  • Provide legal advice on how to proceed with your divorce. They can explain the legal requirements for divorce in North Carolina, help you understand your rights and obligations.
  • Represent you in court — If your divorce case goes to court, a divorce lawyer can represent you and advocate for your interests. They can present evidence, cross-examine witnesses, and make legal arguments on your behalf.
  • Draft legal documents necessary for your divorce. This can include a separation agreement, divorce petition,, and any court filings.
  • Help with property division — Dividing marital property can be a complex and contentious process. A divorce lawyer can help you identify and value all marital assets, negotiate a fair property settlement, and ensure that any settlement is legally binding.
  • Assist with child custody and support — If you have children, a divorce lawyer can help you navigate the child custody and support process. They can help you understand the legal standards for custody and child support, negotiate a parenting plan, and ensure that your children’s best interests are protected.
  • Provide emotional support and guidance throughout the process. They can help you stay focused and make rational decisions during these difficult times.
  • Update your estate plan – this is extra important so your ex doesn’t inherit any of your finances or have control of them, especially if they are for the benefit of any of your children.

Contact Apple Payne Law Today

At Apple Payne Law, we understand that going through a divorce can be devastating. It’s even more painful when you’re in the beginning stages of this process and when you’ve accepted that you can’t fix your relationship.

Our team of compassionate and reliable attorneys is here for you. We will provide you with legal guidance and emotional support during this challenging time. You can depend on us.

Contact us today so we can discuss your next steps.

Author Bio

Ronald D. Payne II
Ronald D. Payne II is the CEO and Managing Attorney of Apple Payne Law, a North Carolina law firm he founded in 2018. With more than 11 years of experience practicing law, he is dedicated to representing clients in a wide range of legal matters, including business law, estate planning, family law, probate, and traffic law.

Ronald received his Juris Doctor from the Wake Forest University School of Law and is a member of the North Carolina Bar Association. He has received numerous accolades for his work, including being awarded the 2020 Client’s Choice Award by Avvo and multiple Rising Star awards from Super Lawyers.

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